Milestones and celebrations of life always feel like the perfect endings and beginnings. It’s wild to think that I’ve shared nearly 3 years’ worth of highlights of my service in the United States Peace Corps AND a 3-year MA graduate school journey on this site!
Restructuring my life (again) feels like the perfect time to either end this blog or change its trajectory. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to continue: my current path and pace of life does not provide the same ‘clarity’ that the previous journeys did (i.e. expectations, timelines, etc.). Besides, I’m doing a lot of internal and personal ‘work’ that doesn’t warrant public attention. I mean, this platform has always shared my productivity and social activism, so would talking about hours of cleaning and taking care of family ‘fit’ here? Maybe not… Posts of the ‘original’ nature were already scarce. Thus, this writing practice doesn’t provide the fulfillment and urgency it once did.
I also feel that since I have gained freedom from graduate school and three jobs/70 hours of work per week, this summer’s experiences have felt unique and natural, i.e. I don’t feel the need to write anymore. Living in and embracing liminal spaces or experiences helped me reevaluate what I want to share, or if I can share in a worthwhile way, as some things can only, truly, and deeply be felt in the present moment.
Without being homeless and food insecure, worrying about cops and racism, and behaving in lines with a career escalator, living actually made sense again. In May after I applied for my CA APCC#, I spent 1 month in Philippines reuniting with loved ones. Visiting my mother’s and father’s ancestral grounds was the priority since I was unable to do so 3 years ago (when I was stranded during the pandemic). I met so many family members I never knew of and learned a lot about our history, villages, and culture!
Reconnecting with nature was another priority as I finally had the (social) contexts, supports, and opportunities to be safe and able to go outside stress-free again. Day-long 24km hiking trips to places like Mt. Marami with my family reminded me that love doesn’t have to be a transactional connection where people and places ‘do things’ for one another: it can be enough to simply exist (together).
Finally, it was nice to live humbly and be open-minded. I may not consider myself Catholic, but I acknowledge that it is part of my cultural roots due to the impact of Spanish and US colonialism and imperialism in the Philippines. As such, I respected my family and went to church with them almost every day. It was a religious and spiritual retreat I never asked for, yet learned a lot from. Visiting places like Lourdes Grotto and Mirador Heritage & Eco-spirituality Park reminded me that it can be possible to find gratitude and awe in both the religious and spiritual realms.
Due to legal/visa restrictions, I left the Philippines as soon as the month was over. I may be away for now, but I keep in touch with my family there in whatever ways I can.
“We are travelers on a cosmic journey, stardust, swirling and dancing in the eddies and whirlpools of infinity. Life is eternal. We have stopped for a moment to encounter each other, to meet, to love, to share. This is a precious moment. It is a little parenthesis in eternity.” Paulo Coelho
*Anything shared in this post is to support education and multicultural awareness and/or to express my own opinions. I do not get any sponsorship or money for this. If you would like to support me, please do so directly through my links and enjoy at your discretion. Thank you for understanding.
Other peaceful resources~
Babaylan Studies (Decolonization Practices)
National Suicide Prevention Hotline 1800 273 8255
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The Healing MAAT 
Beautiful post. Congrats on your achievements! It is always wonderful connecting with your family and your roots. The wonderful thing about personal blogs is that they grow as we grow, and it’s great to pivot and totally change things up/change the trajectory, as you mentioned. Then again, I’m biased, since I enjoy reading your blog, and hope you will stay!